Borders, Walls & Soul Keys Part 2

Continued from Borders, Walls & Soul Keys Part 1
This is from the Gypsy Mama Travels series and is part of the co-created Dance, Community & Social Connection Research Project.
*****************************************************************************
Late June 1999 - San Antonio, TX

Up until that point, I had no idea, none at all of where or how that idea had gotten seeded in my life.  But finding this paper, I find myself feeling into my dreams a bit deeper and realize that yes, it had always just been there, this dream of Cali.  All the sudden this dream was just this deep inner knowing. I just knew that I would someday live in California, and knew I always knew it.

Now consciously realizing this “knowing”, I wonder what I would find there.

*******************************************************************************************
Present Day, On Highway 40 somewhere in California before entering Arizona

I am approaching the Border now, reminiscing on my almost 20 years in California, looking back on ALL that I had found.  The people I have met, loved and let go of.  The children that I gave birth to. The jobs that I took on.  The many attempts at starting my own business, failing and starting again.  The places I fell in love with.  The experiences I NEVER thought I would have.

The growth.  The learning.  The healing.  Wash, rinse and repeat.

I lived a full life, many times over, in this state.  In a way, I am happy to be leaving - to be given this unique opportunity to start over again, in a new city, with a fresh slate.

And yet, remembering how living in Cali had always been my dream, I am still baffled.  Baffled and saddened at how I am being removed from a place I love, for many reasons.

One of those reasons, I am deeply connected with the land of Californi - and of course the weather.  It's Redwood trees, the Santa Cruz Mountains, the secret entrance to Ano Nuevo Beach. This land became my grandparents, teaching me of ancient ways of being and thinking about the world; welcoming me in to be restored, renewed and rebalanced.

Another reason, Soul Keys. I feel I still have soul keys to uncover in Cali.
That is what I call them now - those moments of destiny or fate or whatever ya want to call it - that bring you into the "in between worlds".  A place where dreams of the subconscious mind collide with 3D reality.  A revelation that there is a deep inner knowing breaking into your consciousness that is beyond time. Moments where the fog of monotony recedes, and you are shown how very magical our existence is.  Soul Keys start like DeJa Vu, yet is way beyond that experience.

Soul keys can be found in events, places or people.
Oftentimes in all three.
They are just like the function of a key:
to open a doorway - or portal - into a deeper state of awareness.
Awareness about reality, your soul and your true existence.

Finding Soul Keys allows you to make a change in this reality faster, more efficiently -
if you pay attention to them and do the work. 

Following Soul Keys will allow you to unite with your true Self, your passions and dreams.
Will reunite you with people from your Soul Family,
and will connect you to your Twin Flame - your true Beloved.

While I had had a few Soul Key moments in my younger years, I had built way too many walls in my life to allow the awareness of those moments in on a regular basis. It wasn't until the end and departure from my marriage, and eventually the Christian Church - that my mind and soul started to clear itself - making room for these soul keys to surface. Now, soul key moments happen to me on a regular basis, breaking me out of the mold of the standard American life - allowing me to change my old behavioral patterns into something more beneficial.

Now, from this perspective, I look back on my life and see other Soul Key moments that I had had, but not been aware of.

As I sit in my car almost at the border, I can feel there are still Soul Keys for me in Cali. So I am a bit baffled - yet trusting - that these Soul Keys will be revealed in other ways.

Yet another reason: to move out of Cali means departing from the daily life of my 10-year-old son.
He and I are like two-peas-in-a-pod, deeply connected and bonded.  And yet, and yet - I have been able to hear in these past months - and longer if I am honest- that it is for his benefit for me to move on, allowing our relationship to take on a new form.

This makes no rational sense to me; yet at this point in my life, I know better than to challenge the deep inner knowing I have with the rational voices of "sense & sensibility."

So, after no short of five solid attempts to get the Universe to change Its mind and allow me to stay longer in Cali, I finally threw up my hands and acquiesced.  This wasn't my first choice for myself - to move away, out of state - but I had given it all I had.  All doors, windows and cracks had been repeatedly closed.

For when the deeper inner voice speaks into your life, into my life...I know better at this point in my life that to ignore Her. When there is a call on your life and when you are committed to listening to those calls - there is NO CHANGING those aforementioned calls.

As one of my mentor's says, "Shift or be shifted."

I was way past the point of wanting to "be shifted"...so listened I did.

And if I am honest with myself, I feel a deeper Soul Key calling to me from somewhere beyond...way over yonder towards the Eastern side of the US.

So here I come - Soul Key.  Following your thread pulling me along yet again...