I highly encourage you to read the following two posts BEFORE reading this one so as to understand why I am seeking a divorce from the Church: “Semantics, Language & Prophecy“; “Why Criticize a System and Not People?” & Divorcing the Church.
approximate reading time: 6-7 minutes
CLARITY
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| Taken from here |
The funny thing about clarity is it keeps coming. The more you think about an event, dissect it, look at it from different angles…the more you try to expand the gray matter that sits between two things called ears…the more it -clarity – keeps coming. That is where I find myself now. I originally wrote this post the day of the shootings in Connecticut. It was one post that grew into several. I have rewritten, rewritten and rewritten again. I am sure once this thing is published in a week from now, that I probably could have done another couple of edits, shifting, changing, evolving my thoughts. In fact, it seems that clarity is kind of like – well evolution.
On this note of clarity, in case you did not take the time to read my previous posts – which I don’t blame you, who has all this time to read now-a-days any how? – I want to clarify a few things to ensure we are all on the same page:
1) I use language as much as I can metaphorically. I use it to paint a picture in a physical world of my abstract world that lies in my mind. Since I can think at a much faster rate than I can write or that you can read or talk…I aim at using descriptive words that are meant to get your attention, turn your ear, to raise an eyebrow. I use language to hopefully get you to think a little deeper, a little harder…perhaps a little different than you have before to see if you can expand your mind…which I strongly believe is a step that is needed for healing.
2) I am attacking the System of the Church, which I define as the Doctrine of the Church, and not any one person or group of people that make up the Church. I strongly believe it is this System that is driving the people in the Church. I strongly believe that in blaming the System, I can see my fellow brothers and sisters as my fellow humans and NOT AS ENEMIES. It helps me direct my focus, my energies and my love. It helps me extend forgiveness while “keeping up the fight” to set people free from bondage.
3) I am using the word “divorce” not as a means to say I completely thumb my nose at the Church, the gods I see in the Church nor any one person. I am using it metaphorically to say that I PERSONALLY needed to walk away for a bit, to let my old relationship die – the one that is tied to the reasons below – whether that was the truth of what I was taught or it was just my PERSONAL interpretation on what I was taught – this old relationship for me needed to die. YET, this was and is ALL IN HOPES that I could “resurrect” a new relationship, a healthier one in its place.
All in all, I needed and need to go through this process. This is me as I try to figure out, to discern, to sift out what the Spiritual Truths are that bring freedom versus the Doctrine of Literalism that I feel brings bondage.
GROUNDS FOR DIVORCE
1) Misrepresentation: I have always wondered where the God of the Bible came from. Well, without being a spoiler…basically I started reading history, asking questions and reading more history…seeking to understand cultures from Ancient of Days. I now see where all gods and goddesses come from. As I look closer at the Bible, I do not believe there is only ONE god that shows up in the Old Testament, but many. There is ONE DIVINE that shows up – anytime Love, Mercy & Justice show up for ALL humankind. The other values of war, killing, tribal dominance, slavery, oppression and ownership of women, etc. that are supported by the term “god”….I no longer see these as the ONE TRUE GOD.
While the Divine is in the Bible – I do not believe the Bible and everything in it is the Divine.
One last food for thought: my Jewish friend reminds me that in Judaism there is a saying that, “Without the breath of man God would not exist.”
2) Literalism is not the only way to view Scripture:
Original Sin, Hell, Salvation & Other Doctrine: That clarity thing…it has me seeing that I actually do not completely discredit the doctrines of the Church. I know – crazy huh? The thing is I do think you can take them literally if you want. The thing is if I totally discredit literalism and the doctrines – then I discredit the last 16 years of my life. I discredit how Christianity was a path to Spirituality for me, a path to the Divine – one rich in history and tradition and meaning – even if I have not been taught all of it.
Domination: What I DO have a problem with, much like what Rachel Held Evans concluded in Evolving in Monkey Town, is the fact that so many of us – me previously included in this criticism – hold these doctrines to be “self-evident” and all that comes with this. This type of stance creates a “puffed up with knowledge” stance…and I know I had that even if I never outwardly displayed it. I talk more about this in an upcoming post.
Said another way, I do have an issue with LITERALISM when the Church tells us it is the ONLY WAY TO VIEW THE SCRIPTURES. For this is not the entirety of our own rich Christian heritage. For it limits the Divine to a narrow view, keeps us as humans as eternal “children” that never grow up and challenge our minds to expand and to grapple with the “mysteries of God”.
All of the scriptures that are used for these doctrines CAN ALSO BE LOOKED AT metaphorically. As painfully descriptive ways to describe in very real terms the idea of what “Free Will” brings to humanity. Christians in past centuries have done this. Christians amongst us today are doing this.
3) Lack of the Feminine Divine – This one is way too big to go into here…but the fact that women have repeatedly been denied a right to voice their voice in relation to defining the Divine (and Christianity is not the only religion that has done this), that women are still to this day debated as having an equal right to show, express, relate the Divine to the rest of us in our own Feminine language….well, it is making my list of grounds for divorce. More to come on this subject for sure.
4) Hierarchy & Abuse of Power: I believe that the System of the Church, me previously included, have misused our knowledge of Spiritual Truths and pushed it as the literal pill ALL people must swallow if they wished to lead a good life now and get into a place called “heaven” after this life. This constitutes as Spiritual Abuse. This is not an easy topic…and one I tread carefully on. But one I strongly believe WE MUST TALK ABOUT as caring, loving people that wish to be inclusive with ALL. I will be attempting to bring a different view of Spiritual Abuse to the discussion next week.
5) HEAVEN & HELL: I do not believe that a LOVING GOD could send his own creation to an eternal place called HELL, one brimming with fire and torment. I think this interpretation has been used for much of Christian history (which I have to admit I’m not even sure when this concept came into being within our history) for reason #4 above. I think this Literal interpretation is used along with the idea of Original Sin and Salvation to keep many in fear…again most likely even unknowingly to those preaching it who also live in fear. My theory again relates that this FEAR is not of God/Divine…but created by serving a System that thrives on maintaining Power and Control over all of us at any cost. In metaphorical language I would call this System and It’s power-seeking appetite “Satan”.
YET, WHO AM I TO JUDGE?
So this is my stance, for today on all these issues. These are the major ones that have led me to seek a break from the Church and its Doctrine for now. While I know many will not be able to accept these terms nor give me space in their hearts to believe differently then I once did and now do from them…I have to say I can do this.
I can honestly give you space to believe all the doctrine however you wish to view it. I am not here to tell you or mandate that you follow my path…for that way of relating brings you no freedom. I have no wish to convert anyone nor be a leader that others must follow. So, if you can hold onto this doctrine and be the Love and Light of the Divine how you are called to do so – then more power to you…
Good questions. Questions I wish I had answers for other than I feel called to share my story as both a human and as a woman. I wish I had another answer except for the fact that just as the majority of the Church and its teachings are freely shared….I feel I have the right to voice my view.
Maybe I share because I continue to hear stories on how the Church – especially the Protestant Church – is losing their young people at alarming rates for America….and because I actually care about this fact. I actually care about the Church. NPR just did a series on this fact…and I think those within our Churches need to hear our stories, stories like mine, if they really are about serving the Divine with Love and wish to have an impact on the future generations.
So for those like me who have found that this message of being born into Original Sin, that they must profess only one way to God or else die in HELL creates a hatred of self that permeates the rest of your life and keeps you from being able to live the Abundant and Full life that Christ talks about…then I open myself up and I share my story. I open myself and my story up for those who truly want to not just listen, but to hear there is another way. I open myself up to bring hope to those that like me – could see the Door, feel the Door and sense there was something more to this life…that change is possible and living like Jesus is possible. I want to help you find freedom in the Divine, which is Love, and if letting go of this doctrine is a means to do that…then I want to tell you that you can let go of it…and that instead of stepping off the cliff to Hell we are told this step would bring – you might actually be leaping into the arms of Love.
